This article contains topics of a sensitive nature. If you, yourself or peers may be struggling with mental health or anything else discussed in this post, please find somebody to talk to.
You may find these additional links useful:
https://www.beateatingdisorders.org.uk/support-services/helplines
https://www.talkingtherapies.nelft.nhs.uk/waltham-forest-/
Self Love and Sports
“A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval” – Mark Twain
For the majority of my life I lived through other people’s opinions. The judgement of others decided how I lived my life; my emotions were controlled by others and with that I felt my body was too. I grew up with anxiety, depression and insecurities as a result of a lack of self love, it never occurred to me that self love was the key to my happiness.
I wanted everyone to like me, I wanted people to envy me for my popularity and my looks. Unfortunately, the mindset I held within secondary school turned me into a bully. I was so insecure about myself that I developed an eating disorder where I would starve myself and throw up my food then criticize others for their weight and their lifestyle. I was so afraid of losing my popularity and my friends which ironically I did, I wanted to change myself and become a better person but with that I lost the only thing I really cared about at the time. I eventually progressed into another eating disorder where I would binge on fatty food which led me to becoming overweight within a matter of weeks. I became suicidal and felt so lonely and so lost. However, the one thing I continued throughout my life was sports. I found myself forgetting about my problems and worries when partaking in sports and with it I was able to find love within myself.
Towards the end of my time at secondary school I pushed myself to participate in multiple sports clubs and physical activities, it was during these times that I felt the happiest and it was a way for me to enjoy working on myself. My 16th summer showed development, I worked out throughout summer to lose weight, I made new friends and for the first time in my life I felt good about myself.
Coming to LSC I was given multiple opportunities to take part in a variety of sports, I started playing volleyball, badminton and netball. Over time the only validation I found myself looking for was the one from myself, I realised my potential and my strengths and so I started finding ways to apply the criticism I was given from my coaches to my training, but I was doing it for myself.
Sports helped me acknowledge what real self love is. I have now grown to be a beautiful, confident and loving woman as a result of the love I felt through and from sports. Despite my hard work and effort to have gotten to where I am I still suffer from anxiety because of the trauma that has occurred within my life, but I will continue to work on myself and love myself with the help from sports.
“Be the love you never received” – Rune Languni
-Anonymous